6 Keys To Good Communication With Teenagers
Puberty is a complicated stage in a child’s life. It is a time of numerous changes that affect their appearance and emotions. Good communication with teenagers can then become very difficult. To give you a better idea of how to talk to them, we’ll give you some helpful suggestions today.
Adults can really struggle to have good communication with teens. Between the ages of 12 and 20, children’s interests revolve around themselves and their independence.
Parents, meanwhile, are often a source of conflict, a repression of their freedom and constant quarrels.
However, we all know that the ultimate goal for parents is the happiness of their children. To achieve this, there must be a healthy dialogue. Of course, it can be extremely challenging and quite difficult to try and maintain a relaxed and trusting relationship with your teen.
6 keys to good communication with teenagers
While there can be difficulties in talking to a teen, parents should be patient and never give up. After all, it is their best tool for bonding with their children.
Here are some recommendations that may be helpful:
1. Don’t force the situation
A chat should not take place when the parents want it. Rather, it should take place when teenagers need it. Don’t force them to sit down and talk and tell them about their problems.
The best thing you can do is show that you are open, understanding and available. Empathy will also be a great help. Without being pressured, just say that you’ve also been through similar situations and that your experience could be helpful.
2. Listening is important for good communication with teenagers
Interestingly, the second key to good communication with teens has to do with listening rather than talking. Many conversations with parents and children end in monologues, speeches and anecdotes that are irrelevant. This way you will only manage to chase them away.
Your mission is the opposite. You should pay attention to their concerns and, if asked, comment on their opinion. You should act in a practical way, just as a friend would, but at the same time never leave your role as a parent. If you need to set limits in certain matters, don’t hesitate to do so.
3. Build a relationship of trust
In addition to respecting confidentiality, your child also wants to see you as someone he can trust. For example, if he shares a serious problem with you that he has, it’s best to comfort him and then try to fix it.
When all this is done, you can warn him or point out what he did wrong. Just consider what the result would be if you did things differently? He will probably never tell you his problems again.
4. ‘Innocent’ questions are important for good communication with teenagers
A very effective communication tactic is to ask “harmless” questions. For example, you might say something like, “So what you’re really trying to say is…?” Or “This really made you feel like…”
Be careful to do this in a no-doubt manner. Don’t show any suspicion and just be honest.
This not only gives him attention and interest in him, but also a way to relieve tension. It also gives you time to try and come up with another different course of action. This may put him more at ease, and he may even tell you more because of it.
5. You need to bring calm to the conversation
Nothing good can come from talking when shouting and raised voices are the order of the day. Always try to bring a sense of calm and reasoning to the conversation. The teen will be ready to react aggressively to signs of arguing or strong opposition.
6. The Answer
We have already mentioned the importance of listening to good communication with teenagers. But how should we respond now? The first thing to keep in mind is that as much as we want to gain our teen’s trust, we also need to be a role model, guide, and teacher.
That is why we will sometimes have to give in on some things, but on the contrary remain firm on other things. If these are minor issues, try not to give them too much time or priority. Making a conflict out of everything will really hurt your relationship.
Try to look for the positive side in every situation. Encourage and trust your teen and tell him that with effort and perseverance, everything will always work out.
Remember that at this age they tend to be dramatic and negative. So don’t be alarmed if your child seems a little ‘closed up’. He just learns how to build his own identity.
Always keep in mind that you have a different mindset than them. Put yourself in their shoes and think about how hard it is for teens to open up and trust their parents. Don’t miss the chance to help them!