Why Is My Teen So Rebellious?

Do you ever wonder, “ Why is my teen so rebellious?” Adolescence is a very stigmatized stage. Parents fear it and we all assume that young people become unruly at this age. That is why the stereotype of the rebellious adolescent is part of the collective imagination. We therefore constantly try to avoid or appease this behavior.

Once your child has passed puberty, you may have noticed changes in his or her attitude. The behavioral changes are more noticeable in some young people than in others. But in both cases the patterns are similar. There is resistance to authority, questioning of norms, and resistance to parents.

These are all natural behaviors typical of this stage. But if we are not aware of them in advance, they can cause confusion and distress as parents. To help you better prepare for your child’s adolescence, let’s explain what causes these behavioral changes. And more importantly, how you can guide them.

Why is my teen so rebellious?

Although you may have thought otherwise, your teen is not rebellious because he wants to annoy you or make you uncomfortable. Nor do they act that way through lack of education or changes in their personality.

Below, we’ll show you the top reasons that could lead your child to be rebellious.

They suffer from stress because of all the changes

First of all, you have to understand that it is not easy for adolescents to go through this phase. Suddenly they are confronted with a multitude of changes (Spanish link). With physical, emotional and social pressure that wasn’t there before. Learning to deal with this new reality can be confusing and complicated.

In fact, they can often feel overwhelmed and react to stress in an inappropriate way. They become short-tempered, reactive, or moodier than usual. But this is nothing but the result of an internal conflict that they cannot control.

We must not lose sight of the fact that hormonal action causes sudden changes in mood. In addition , adolescents’ cognitive development is not yet complete, so they are not yet able to control their impulses or measure the consequences of their actions as an adult does.

In short, your adolescent child does not yet have the strategies and personal resources needed to cope with the changes they are facing at this stage.

They claim themselves as a person

When teens defy their parents, break rules, or resist authority, we brand them as rebellious or disobedient. Yet their attitude is in a sense understandable.

How would you react if someone told you how to dress, what music to listen to, or when to use your phone?

If someone else tried to impose themselves on such essentials in your life, you would rebel too. And while it is clear that adolescents are not adults yet and that they need boundaries, their point of view is understandable: they no longer feel like children.

Therefore, an adolescent rebels to the extent that their parents adopt a maladaptive parenting style (Spanish link).

The less you listen to them, the more you resort to punishment. And the more your commands overshadow the dialogue, the more likely your youngster will revolt. And this will happen as a way of justifying themselves as individuals and protecting their right to be who they are.

Teens Seek Independence

Some parents are shocked when their teens withdraw from them physically and emotionally, don’t want to spend time with the family, or aren’t as loving as they used to be.

However, this is a natural and healthy course of action. During adolescence, the family ceases to be the main reference for the youth and their peer group takes a leading role.

Therefore, it is normal for your child to want to spend more time with his friends, spend several hours with them talking to them. and seek their approval instead of yours. Try not to take these events personally or as an act of rebellion. They are changes that are necessary for their maturation.

They may be suffering from a mental disorder

Despite all of the above, it is important to remember that rebellious behavior can come from suffering.

If these defiant, hot-tempered, or aggressive attitudes appear excessive, the young person may be experiencing a mental health issue. Anxiety, depression, or bullying may be behind these behavioral changes and should not be ignored.

Why is your teen so rebellious? It’s part of their growth

As you can see, rebellion is a normal part of adolescence. We don’t necessarily have to view it as something negative. If it stays within the expected limits, it is only a sign of the healthy development of the young person’s personality.

So arm yourself with patience and understanding. Promote dialogue to guide your child as they go through this phase of their life. Instead of labeling them as rebellious and blaming them for their behavior, try guiding them and helping them manage their emotions. And if you think there may be an underlying problem, don’t hesitate to consult a professional.